I’m trying to be independent. It’s not that I’m chained or restricted, but very dependent on others. For smallest of things I wait for my husband to accompany me. Don’t know why, but it’s been a habit for a few years now. Maybe, because of the comfort level I enjoy. With a toddler at hand, a helping hand was something I was looking for. Although, I did the chores for the kid.
I wish I had realized a long ago. Today, I’m unwell. Had to see the Doctor. So on my way to the clinic, I suddenly made a decision to see the Doctor on my own. My hubby surprisingly asked if I could manage. That showed me how depended I’m on him.
So I get off in the middle of the road, walk towards the clinic. I feel so liberated (not exaggerating) but that’s what I felt. There was a positive bounce in my steps rather than the scared and cautious ones I’m used to.
In the clinic, while waiting for my turn, I evaluated the situation. I realized it’s all in the mind. For a long time, for the reasons unknown, I have limited myself to self applied boundaries.
It made no sense, I felt so foolish. This was not who I was a few years ago.
Fear and situations can make a person mentally challenged. The above given reason is one of the situations. I have so many more to take care of, as and when I do. I will make a note of them.