Nothing’s Permanent

I’m really confused. I dont know where I’m headed to. I’ve my thoughts clear but still, there are lot of things still looking blur. maybe I’m making mountain of an anthill.

Why does one’s life depend on a third person’s decision in a marriage? Cant we live as we want it to be? Or, am I being selfish? I dont have an answer for all these questions.I made the decision, I’m not sure if I’m regretting it, but, I’m not happy with it.

I’m really affected by these thoughts that I dreamt something really weird. I dream t like everybody in my family including me were being tortured. It was severe and, we were tortured by people whom we know very closely. We were not given to eat and we had bruises and blood oozing out of them. We were pleading somebody to get us out from there. It was so scary that, Woke up. After sometime, may be early in the morning, I dreamt about birds, to be precise, they were doves, cooing in pair. They were in our garden. There were lot of people around, enjoying the birds. I was doing one thing that I loved the most, Clicking away the pictures of these beautiful white feathered lovers.

If I try to analyse these dreams, especially, the first one, I feel it is close to the reality of what I’m currently going through. I feel I’m being victimized of a situation in our relationship. Probably the unknown person is the root cause of all this. Maybe the second dream symbolizes that Dove represents peace and may be after while everything would settle and I will have peace.They say seeing a white Dove also signifies a message and blessing from the Holy Spirit.

I guess God’s there with me, telling that all’s going to be well. I wish that happens very soon with my life. Nothing in Life will be permanent. Things that go down should come up and the vice verse.


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